The Best Thing in the World

I'm truly convinced that I've degenerated. I don't understand how I could be so driven, and happily driven, in the past. Now I'm just wasting away, devoid. And soon I'll be a void.

And really, it's not about grades, exams, results. These aren't the things that matter, I'd trade them for so much more. It's self respect.

I feel like I've lost something. A few years ago, I knew I was losing it, fought so hard to keep it, lost it, struggled to find it again, and it feels like I've given up.

I'm so apathetic it kills me.

The Best Thing in the World
Elizabeth Barrett Browning

What's the best thing in the world?
June-rose, by May-dew impearled;
Sweet south-wind, that means no rain;
Truth, not cruel to a friend;
Pleasure, not in haste to end;
Beauty, not self-decked and curled
Till its pride is over-plain;
Love, when, so, you're loved again.
What's the best thing in the world?-
-Something out of it, I think.