Always Behind you

After countless frustrations, photoshopping camps and 'Prof Lee, I hate you for puting me through this', tadaa, it's finally over. It's one of the biggest and most energy zapping project I've done in my life, but I've to admit, completing it is immensely satisfying.

The team was really discouraged and resigned to moving on and hoping we'd scrap through the module with a decent grade after our presentation... But... BUT... BUT....

We were placed second!

I couldn't believe it. After the judges asked us one question, and simply said, 'Okay. You may go now.' Whereas other groups were bombarded with questions, and feedback, be it compliments or criticisms. And we were wondering if we were indeed so bad that we didn't even deserve a few more words. Well, there's always hope.

This project has been a learning experience, with the most unusual (and unexpected) group dynamics I've encountered so far. I dare say that not everyone put in an equal amount of work in terms of tangible contributions, but I wrote in my peer evaluation, 'I strongly believe that each of us should be grade EQUALLY for everyone contributed to the best they could, doing what they can, which I believe is what matters. And everyone put in an equal amount of enthusaism, commitment and time.'

I truly believe that's what matters. It doesn't affect me that someone cannot do as much, but it disappoints me when people who are capable of doing something, simply do not bother to do so. Perhaps I apply my own standards on everyone else, unfairly.

For me, it was a first. First time I wore (a baggy) T-shirt and jeans for a formal presentation (we were the ONLY group among a pool of black and white suits)... and the first time I presented alone on behalf of my team. Never knew speaking for 20 minutes was that tiring. So, now we'll always be remembered as the 'team in t shirts and only one speaker but won something.'

I have a love-hate relationship with presentations and speaking (as I do with so many things). Many do not believe it when I say I lack the confidence... well, I know myself best, and I take it as a personal challenge to speak to a crowd. I dread/hate speaking, but always seek to get better... but I guess...

'better' is an illusion sometimes. As I was practising a little in front of that mirror, there was the thought of 'you could sound okay, but so what if that will never be okay to you.'

And I've met some of the most interesting people, and saw the meaning of 'Do not judge a book by its cover.' This group has been incredibly united, and supportive, for which I'm grateful for.

I'm also grateful to my prof for all the inspiration he provided.

Girl Power (our team name, haha) rocks!

There's a piece of great news I'd like to tell my dearest friend. It's so exciting that I'm almost bursting to spill it, but... something holds me back, I don't know what.