Ugh!

This evening, Kebs and I ran round the track instead, and I decided to find out how long I take to do a 2.4km run. (For the first time in three years). After huffing, and puffing, and feeling like I was going to fall over after finishing...

About 13min 15 seconds.

Well, it's quite a lot better than I expected. I was so afraid it'd be 15 or 16 minutes. If I had to take my Napfa now, it'd be comfortably within an A. But out of old habit, that voice at the back of the head is nagging me about how I used to be able to do it within 12 minutes. That I should have just sprinted the entire last round. That I have become so disgustingly, pathetically S L O W.

It makes me so tempted to start training, to prove to myself that I can possibly run it within 12 minutes once again. For what reason, I don't know. I remember the days I used to feel so oppressed by the stopwatch, for no good reason at all. And I gave up timing myself after that because it just killed the joy of running. But ugh, I've become so lousy... I feel so gross.

When I say things like that, I really do think I deserved to be slapped. It's all rubbish.