Me and my CCF in Beijing Day 10

This morning, the weather was cool, and I got to work without sweating! =)

On the way to work, I saw an old man doing road works, and then a teenage boy, certainly younger than me. Somehow, that image struck me - it's a living for them, and I saw it as emblemetic of the social gap (and certainly, there are people in far worst positions all over the country). It's not like I don't see construction workers in Singapore, but it just hits harder here. Maybe it's the contrast - the existence of an immensely wealthy group of Chinese is evident from some of the malls, housing ostentatious international labels. And there are many of these malls, along with people peddling along streets, the shopkeepers you haggle with at the shopping centre. Why don't I pay so much attention at home? Maybe I assume that the poverty gap is narrower (this I'm fairly sure), and that many people are subsidized for housing, or are given a roof over their head if found to be homeless. Just the other day, I saw an old lady sleeping on a patch of grass with her bag.

All these put me to shame. The things I obsess over! =( However rich or successful I become, if I ever do, I hope I always remember my blessings in life.

I tend to forget I'm an adult, until I meet people younger than me, who are already working harder. That day, my hairstylist cheekily enquired my age, and I was surprised to discover he was a year younger than me, at 21. The thing is, I always feel like I'm still in my pre-20 teenage years, because I'm a student, in the university, only responsible towards my grades and whatever else I choose. When I see people younger than me working, I always cannot pictuer myself in their shoes. At that moment, when someone younger than me was doing my hair, I was once again reminded that I'm a full adult, 20, and I should think like one.

Which means knowing how to take care of myself, grasping the consequences of the things I do, and not holding on to the childish beliefs I had for so long.

Oh yes - I've to mention, the sight this morning once again spurred me into a sense of disgust at Singaporeans who mindlessly complain and criticize every things. We tend to look up at how things could be better, but look down to the ground, which runs deeper. Complain, complain, complain, and not acknowleding the little things we have which others don't. I don't deny that I'm guilty of that, but I try not to criticize without thinking. No place is perfect - I've been to other countries, lived in New York, China, travelled to Europe, and I can say that wherever it was, there were things to like more than my own country, but also things I have at home that were just lacking elsewhere. What we have, what we make out of things, is our attitude - no need to get all bitter! I don't know why these things piss me off so much these days. Of course I have my own criticism about the goverment, or my country, but that doesn't make everything bad. There are enough things for me to make a meaningful life.

I was impressed by my parents' friends whom I met over dinner last week. They said, 'we're in Beijing so we live like the locals.' Meaning that they take busses/MRT wherever they go, rather than hop into cabs all the time. I think that's right, in a sense. I can afford to cab to work everyday (chaeper than my bus ride back home), and back - but I rather walk if I'm not taking the bus, simply because I'd feel bad to be pampering myself like that? Who am I just because my currency is worth more? No point flaunting it since I've to go back to my normal life when I get home.

And I think the same goes for NUS. We love to grouse about how stressful, and rigid it is, and how we hate it (mostly jokingly, I'd like to believe), but it shouldn't be so. I dare say NUS has given opportunities, and experiences that made me thankful to be where I am. I've studied at New York University, and Beijing University (really briefly) - two very different places, each with it's own merits and dismerits relative to my own university. Perhaps if I'm struggling and I hate exams, I'll hate NUS - I can't see past my own experiences. Still, annoys me how everyone loves to complain about where they are! Without any measure of objectivity or rationality.

I've said so much!

I had a lovely lunch today. My dad's colleague picked me up in a huge car with a chauffeur. And took me to lunch at a great Vietnamese place with nice paintings. Dinner with old family friends tonight, an ex army general colleague of my Dad's. What a indulgent day!